There is nothing quite like thinking you’re being a reasonable stepmom, posting your anecdote on Reddit, and then finding out you were so completely wrong. That’s what happened to u/No_Soil2059, who posted this thread on Reddit’s r/AmITheA**hole subreddit.
For context: the original poster has a daughter named Mia (7) and a stepdaughter named Violet (14). She got married to Violet’s father six years ago. One day, Mia asked Violet if she could play on her phone and Violet said no. When Mia asked her mother to make Violet give her the phone, Violet acquiesced, but only after she threw her phone out the window. The phone broke, of course, and Violet was punished. She wasn’t allowed to ask for a new phone and the rest of her electronics were taken away. However, Violet had been saving money of her own from babysitting jobs and was able to purchase a new phone herself. This angered the Redditor further, and she took the phone away. Now, Violet’s grandparents are calling their daughter-in-law out for taking away valuables that aren’t hers to confiscate.
We’re siding with Violet’s grannies here. The reality is that whether or not the original poster likes it, Violet bought that new phone herself. Sure, it was overdramatic to throw the old phone out the window, but when you’re 14 years old, it’s pretty much pre-determined in your genes that you will be overdramatic. There’s also clearly an unfair bias here towards Mia. Many of the Reddit commenters critique the original poster for letting Mia demand whatever she wants rather than teaching her that no means no. No doesn’t mean “let me ask Mom to make it a yes.” That mentality can get toxic really quickly. We don’t want Mia to become the kind of teenager that has her Mom go to the principal so she can switch to the easier Math teacher (remember those people? The worst!).
Anyway, this is not the first time family dynamics such as these have led to conflict. This stepfather was asked to walk his stepdaughter down the aisle at her wedding, which caused a ton of drama with the biological father. Yikes!
Keep scrolling for u/No_Soil2059’s post in her own words and for the most savage reactions!